Jose Mourinho’s absence from training must mean he’s getting sacked… right?

Jose Mourinho is definitely getting sacked.

Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho was apparently absent from the club's Carrington training ground on Wednesday morning. The Portuguese coach, who has received a torrent of criticism for a combination of both his team's performances and his own behaviour (particularly towards the British media), did not appear to join his squad as they arrived for the session. While the likes of Paul Pogba, Marcos Rojo, Marouane Fellaini and even the manager's coaching team were pictured arriving at Carrington, it was pointed out that Jose - usually seen arriving in the back of a car - did not. This got people asking questions: where is Jose? What has happened to Jose? When will Jose be here? Has Jose been sacked? The answer, given his absence, is almost undoubtedly that 'yes he has been unceremoniously sacked because there is no other reason for someone to miss work about from them definitely being sacked'. Anyone who has ever worked a day in their lives is acutely aware that the only explanation for a manager being missing - from either a football team or a supermarket or an office - is that they will imminently be sacked or have already been sacked. It can definitely never be explained by the fact that people have lives outside of work, families, emotions, stress and health issues to think about. It's definitely any of those things. It's because he's been sacked.