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Published 10:29 20 May 2015 BST
Updated 13:10 20 May 2015 BST
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TRANSLATION: The jacket that fits the pauper, is warm enough for a king.On his team's attitude We had a LOT of injuries... seriously, Phil Jones was set for the glue factory at one stage, but the team showed amazing spirit. From the dank depths of 13th, we soared to third. On the season's turning point We got royally done by the Gooners but, after, Wazza addressed the boys. I could not understand a lot of what he said but he mentioned 'second'. He looked at me and I said, 'Feck it, why not?' We went on and romped six games in a row.
On almost winning the league... almost
Stay with me on this one. IF we had beaten Chelsea, as we deserved to, we could be sitting here tonight on 80 points. Chelsea would only be on 81 points. We would be gliding go into the final league game still in the hunt for the title. If, if, if... 80% possession against Chelsea. Chelsea! You know what I mean?
I love an encore so watch our dust next season.
On paying attention to the manager
[Verbatim] I want to say something. Pay attention to the manager!
On musical appreciation
Listen up, we have a lass up here that kicked ass on the saxophone earlier.
Give her some props.
'Sidewinders'
We would not be surprised if van Gaal had relaxed by watching some Blazing Saddles and Gammy Johnson's famous speech before the ceremony:

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