World’s greatest surfer, and worst Baywatch actor, announces retirement

Maybe now he can write that follow-up to his song 'Feeling the Feelings'.

11-time world surfing champion, and 68-time winner on the Pro Tour, Kelly Slater will sex-wax his board for the last time at the upcoming Rip Curl Pro event. The 43-year-old, who once claimed five consecutive world crowns, made the announcement via Instagram. He wrote, 'There are too many people to thank and memories to go over but here’s to hoping I can pull a rabbit out of the hat and win one last event this week.' https://instagram.com/p/080WuOzbF4/ He is currently in Australia, and the post was made on April 2. However, that meant it was still April 1 in the United States. Slater does have April Fool's Day previous - announcing a split from Quiksilver that turned out to be as bogus as his acting career. Surf Europe magazine believe the announcement is [in the rhymes of MC Hammer] too legit, too legit to quit. Slater starred for two glorious seasons in Baywatch. He did not stray too far from reality, appearing as talented surfer, Summer's love interest, and Billy's rival for her affections, Jimmy Slade.